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I don’t watch "Coronation Street" because I think it is the BAFTA/OSCAR equivalent of bad actors acting badly, but as we’re a bit behind down here in t’Antipodes, I was overruled by a superior authority, namely my wife, into watching the 50th Anniversary show.
The glorious half-century was to be celebrated in soapy brilliance by killing off of half the cast. I was then curious, because I knew I’d be disappointed at the killing off of only half the cast, but given I had no choice I now wanted to know who was to die.
It was skilfully done, with not only a gas explosion at t’joinery, but a train crashing off t’viaduct. That’s the second train to do that, though judging by the look on t’drivers face he hadn’t seen that episode.
Then the truths start coming out, who’d been shagging whom, and who was the father of Mollie’s Jack [I always thought it was Jack, in a weak moment].She left Tyrone after he summoned all his reserves of t’English and called her a "An evil Slag!" which might have applied to Carla, who was shagging Peter, and whose girlfriend -in-waiting Leanne was in turn being shagged by Nick Tinsley who was in Canada the last time I watched t’Street.
Mollie’s departure coincided with a gas explosion at t’joinery. and a train crash at precisely the same moment. There were shots of Rita from t’Kabin buried beneath a hail of Maltesers and Dolly Mixtures. Ashley the Butcher is dead, but his mate Graeme swears to keep the family secret recipe for Elliot’s Prime Pork Sausages alive in his memory.
That were dead impressive I tell you!