Forces Reunited - A few jokes to start the day

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Alan Anthony Yuill
"Silver Surfer"

Membership Level: Full
Posts: 17263
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A Woman went to her Doctor and said, Doctor, I can’t sleep at night. When I’m in the next room, I have this terrible fear that I won’t hear the baby if he falls out of his cot at night. What should i do? "Easy,"said the Doctor, Just take the carpet off the floor,

Smile and you will always be happy.

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20/07/2012 13:53:32

Alan Anthony Yuill
"Silver Surfer"

Membership Level: Full
Posts: 17263
Status: Offline

Fred’s convertible glided to a halt on the edge of a lonely country road.
"I suppose," said his pretty but reluctant date, "you’re going to pull the old ’out of gas’ routine."
"No," said Fred, "I’m going to pull the ’here after’ routine."
"The ’here after’ routine-----what’s that?", she wanted to know.
"If you’re not here after what I’m here after, you’ll be here after I’m gone."

Smile and you will always be happy.

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21/07/2012 05:41:44

Alan Anthony Yuill
"Silver Surfer"

Membership Level: Full
Posts: 17263
Status: Offline

A woman was in a gambling casino for the first time. At the roulette she says, "I have no idea what number to play."
A young, good-looking man nearby suggests she play her age.
Smiling at the man, she puts her money on number 32.
The wheel is spun, and 41 comes up.
The smile drifted from the woman’s face and she fainted.

Think about it

Smile and you will always be happy.

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21/07/2012 23:02:53

Alan Anthony Yuill
"Silver Surfer"

Membership Level: Full
Posts: 17263
Status: Offline

I’m so depressed ... I went to the doctor today and he refused to
write me a prescription for Viagra. Said it would be like putting a
new flagpole on a condemned building.

Smile and you will always be happy.

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24/07/2012 06:07:27

Alan Anthony Yuill
"Silver Surfer"

Membership Level: Full
Posts: 17263
Status: Offline

In a cemetery in England :
Remember man, as you walk by,
As you are now, so once was I.
As I am now, so shall you be,
Remember this and follow me.
To which someone replied by writing on the tombstone:
To follow you I’ll not consent,
Until I know which way you went.

Smile and you will always be happy.

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25/07/2012 02:34:26

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