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Forces Reunited - A few jokes to start the day
www.forcesreunited.org.uk >> General >> Military Stories/Jokes >> A few jokes to start the day
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Alan Anthony Yuill
"Silver Surfer"





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Irish Terrorist POLICE  have surrounded a Dublin department store.
They heard " Bed Linen" was on the second floor.

Smile and you will always be happy.
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21/06/2012 03:31:19
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Alan Anthony Yuill
"Silver Surfer"





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Did you hear what the blond named her pet Zebra?

Spot

Smile and you will always be happy.
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21/06/2012 06:24:08
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john daly
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I really like going out in the car with the Missus its the only time i dare tell her to "Belt up".

But I hate taking the Mother in Law along with us.
Only this morning we got in the car to shop at Tescos, She was moaning when she got in, moaning all the way and still moaning in Tescos car park when  I let her out of the Boot.
 
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21/06/2012 12:45:39
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Alan Anthony Yuill
"Silver Surfer"





Membership Level: Full
Posts: 17263
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WHEN I SAY I’M BROKE - I’M BROKE!

A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day,  
to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

’Good  morning,’ said the young man. ’If I could take a couple minutes of your time,
I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners...

’ ’Go away!’ said the old lady. ’’I’m broke and haven’t got any money!’’
and she proceeded to close the door..

Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed  it wide open...
’’Don’t be too hasty!’’ he said.  ’’Not until you have at least seen my demonstration..’’

And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

’’Now, if this  vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure
from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder.’’

The old lady stepped back and said, ’’Well let me get you  a fork,
’cause they cut off my electricity this morning."

Smile and you will always be happy.
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21/06/2012 14:08:57
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Alan Anthony Yuill
"Silver Surfer"





Membership Level: Full
Posts: 17263
Status: Offline
The chancellor of Oxford University was delighted with his guest speaker for the day; "I’m proud to announce David Beckham will today be giving a talk on the importance of tactics to the game of football, so without further ado, over to you David...’ "Well", Becks started "The good thing about them is they contain only 2 calories and keep your breath fresh all day..."

Smile and you will always be happy.
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21/06/2012 23:47:04
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